The Unitarian Universalist Community Church of Santa Monica

"Accentuate the Possible"

One of the nicest things ministers do is preside at child dedications. As I have grown older, I've had a tendency to confuse my role as minister with being a grandfather, particularly when I hold an infant at the conclusion of the Service of Dedication.

Seems to me the perfect Sunday for a child dedication is the same Sunday members of the Congregation commit their financial resources to support their Church's mission. Both the dedication of children and the dedication of our financial resources have much to say about thankfulness and possibility; about looking to the future.

Perhaps the theme song for today should be: "Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative, latch on to the affirmative, and don't mess with Mr. In-Between." Better still: "Accentuate the possible, eliminate improbable; latch on to potential, and don't be afraid to have a dream!"

Perhaps a good theme for the pledge drive in any congregation would be, "Accentuate the Possible." Possibility in terms of financial commitment has to do with abundance not scarcity. "Accentuate abundance, eliminate scarcity" in our thinking. Even though many of us have more than we ever thought possible, we continue to be influenced by memories of scarcity. If we approach this Congregation's commitment Sunday with a sense of thankful abundance rather than scarcity there will be no financial problems.

The key is motivation. In one of his "Lake Woebegone" stories Garrison Keillor tells about the pledge drive in the fictional Lutheran Church. Clarence Brunsen is Chair of the Pledge Committee. Brunsen stands in the church service one day and says, "Please sign your pledge card; now add 10% because I know how cheap you are!" I do not think that is a good approach. That approach to pledging is based on guilt.

Guilt is only one motivation for financial support of the church. Some churches require the tithe, 10% of income. That is true of the Mormons, and of some of the evangelical churches. For members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, there is a slight variation. Members of local congregations are not required to tithe, however those Mormons who wish to be "Temple Members" are required to tithe along with other requirements. Members of evangelical churches are not given the right or responsibility to make their own decisions, they are told what to do. I don't think that is good for the "inherent worth and dignity of each individual."

Then, there are other religious groups which use the assessment approach. I believe this is true of many Jewish synagogues. A special committee gets together and determines the financial ability of each family in the congregation, and then sends a statement of assessment. Of course families can appeal, but the primary motivation for financial support is assessment.

Our Unitarian Universalist approach is voluntary financial commitment based in gratitude. We try never to appeal to guilt feelings. We do not require a tithe. We do not send a statement of assessment. Rather we ask each individual to pledge and contribute on the basis of freedom of choice. Just as we do not require certain theological beliefs, so we do not require financial commitment. We respect individual freedom.

Freedom is saved from becoming license by gratitude. When thankfulness for all that we are and have is combined with freedom, our lives will be richer. Thankfulness is a two-headed coin. Betty and I walk two miles almost every day. When I get to the end of the first mile, ready to turn around and head for home, I am thankful to have made it that far, and acknowledge the need to keep on going. Thanksgiving is a pause between what has been and what will be.

When Unitarian Universalists combine freedom with thanksgiving our congregations will flourish. When pledging is seen as obligatory, the result will be congregations which are unable to accomplish some of their dreams. A couple of weeks ago, Jacki Weber reminded us that we do not do well letting people know about us. Last week Charlene Langland talked about how much this Congregation has meant to her and her family. She also said she wished she had known about this Congregation earlier.

Charlene also used the metaphor of various "gifts" when she talked about pledging. Who could forget her unique Pulpit Message in which she used the metaphor of gifts from "Victoria's Secret" as a way to think about pledging. So far as that metaphor is concerned, I suggest our pledges be more like "cover ups" than scanty lingerie.

When we accentuate the possible in terms of financial commitment, one of the first possibilities is what Jack Kornfield calls "compassionate generosity," which he relates "letting go." He says, "An act of generosity opens our body, heart and spirit and brings us closer to freedom." Generosity has to do with an attitude of abundance not scarcity.

Here's what I mean. An attitude of scarcity will say, "you mean you want me to give 5% of my after tax income to the Church!" By contrast, an attitude of thankful abundance will say, "Wow! I can use ninety-five percent of my after-tax income for myself!"

An attitude of abundance is related to Kornfield's idea of generosity. I come from a long line of Scots ancestry. My grandfather's name was James Andrew Grant; can't get much more Scots than that. My Father's given name was Athol, named for one of the Highland Lords. We Scots are sometimes characterized as "tight- fisted." My Father used to say, "He is so tight he squeaks when he walks!"

Generosity, by contrast, is a noble concept. In fact the very term comes from the Latin meaning magnanimous, which is the opposite of the traditional Scots parsimoniousness. To be generous is to be "big hearted." One author wrote, "a spontaneous act of generosity performed with unselfish grace is an example of moral beauty."

I have been with you only two months, but in that time I have come to appreciate, indeed to respect and love, this Congregation. We meet here in this lovely building because of the faithful generosity of people long gone. You support a variety of community projects because of your obvious caring to make Santa Monica and this area a more humane place. You support a religious education program so that children will have a place to develop freed from the constraints of orthodoxy. Our generosity builds on the generosity of past generations. Thankful for what has been, and eager for what will be we are committed to this Congregation's future.

However, generosity, always brings a question: "But how can I give or give more; I'm already stretched to the limit? The answer may be in accentuating the possible, particularly in terms of priorities. I read somewhere about a commencement address given by the author, Anna Quindlen at Villanova University some years ago. She said a few things applicable not only to university graduates but to congregations at pledge time: For example:

You are the only person alive who has sole custody of your life - your
Life! Not just your life at the desk, or on the bus, or in the car, or at a
a computer. Not just the life of your mind, but the life of your heart.
Not just your bank account but your soul.

Anna Quindlen was talking about intention, reminding the graduates that what they make of their lives will be the result of intention. This is the same message, in a different way which was in last Sunday's "New York Times Book Review" article, a portion of which I used as the third of today's Readings.

I have not read William Irvine's book, "On Desire," but based on the review it seems to me that the book is dealing with what seems to me to be a modern cultural weakness. Namely, equating personhood with possessions, so that what we want is confused with what we need.

One of the reasons most of us, and I include myself in this, do not have more to provide more for charitable giving is that we have confused what we want with what we need. The result is that sometimes, as Luke Johnson says, ". . . our possessions possess us." I am not suggesting some kind of asceticism; that we need abandon everything and go live in the desert. Rather in the words of the third of today's readings we use our consciousness ". . . not to extinguish desire, but to alter our relationship to our desires (in order to ) achieve tranquility."

My friend and colleague, Tom Owen-Towle, former Minister at First UU Church in San Diego says that Pledge Sunday is a Holy Sunday. His idea is that commitment Sunday each year provides an opportunity for us to re-consider that to which we are truly committed.

Several years ago I came across an article in Macleans Magazine by Peter Newman. He wrote:

"A hundred years from now it won't matter how much money you had
in the bank, what kind of car you drive, or what kind of house you
lived in. But the world may be a better place because you helped
some people." (May, 17, 1999, p.50)

The Service of Dedication for Liliana, like all dedication services for children is actually a reminder of possibilities - of potential. In a way, the annual Commitment Sunday is also a reminder of possibilities - of the tremendous potential of this Congregation. Your service to this community, your care of one another, your commitment to children and youth, all are signs of health. With the building expansion you stand at the threshold of a marvelous future.

I conclude with a true story. Once there was a small college in the Midwest which was facing a financial crisis - a serious cash flow problem. The college needed an immediate influx of cash - seventy-five thousand dollars to be exact. Three alumni were identified who had the resources to give $25,000. each. Three members of the college Board of Trustees were asked to call on the three potential donors.

One of the trustees went to visit a donor in his office in mid-town Manhattan. They talked about the problem and the Trustee asked the donor for a gift of $25,000. The donor reached into his desk drawer and wrote out a check from his money market fund for twenty-five thousand dollars. Here is how the story ends:

"(The Trustee) thanked the donor profusely, and prepared to go. As he was
about to open the door to the lobby, he paused and turned to the donor and
said, 'You know, I'm in capital fund raising for our church and I just
wonder, would you have given the entire $75,000 we needed?' The donor
replied, 'Yes, but you didn't ask.'" (Stephen C. Gray, "Money, Ministry and Stewardship,
UUMA News, Summer, 1999, p.25)

I do not want to make the mistake of that College Trustee and fail to ask. As you know I am your temporary minister; I am "pre- fired." However, I am your minister during this time. So I am asking you to accentuate the possible as you commit your financial resources to this Congregation.

Consider the possibilities of and be thankful for abundance not scarcity. Consider the possibilities of generosity. Consider the dedication of people in the past who have made this Congregation possible. Finally, consider the possibilities of a new consciousness about possessions.

Liliana will flourish as she is loved by Natalie and Roberto. The Unitarian Universalist Community Church of Santa Monica will flourish as we put our gratitude into action on behalf of the continuing healthy development of this Church.

Readings for November 13, 2005

"Compassionate generosity is the foundation of true spiritual life because it is the practice of letting go. An act of generosity opens our body, heart and spirit and brings us closer to freedom. Each act of generosity is a recognition of our interdependence." (Jack Kornfield)

"The key question is not how many possessions we have, but how much the possessions we have possess us. The ways people regard owning things and the value they attach to possessions involves the way they think about human nature (or human freedom in the world), about the place of humans within the world, and about the relation of human beings and the world to the Divine." (Luke Johnson, "Possessions: Mandate and Symbol of Faith," p.7)

"Really, the only hope of managing-not conquering-desire is consciousness. A compressed survey of various religions and philosophical mechanisms humans have created in their attempt to master desire shows that they all come down to our painstakingly achieving greater levels of consciousness. The 'middle path' between hedonism and asceticism that Buddha advised, the prayers of the Jew or Christian, the temperance of the Muslim, the reasoning that underpins all philosophies: these aim not to extinguish desire but to arrive at a state of mindfulness that allows us to alter our relationship to our desires, and thus achieve tranquility." ("I Am Therefore I Want," Review of On Desire by William B. Irvine. "The New York Times Book Review," Sunday, November 6, 2005)